Vancouver Real Estate Smart Ass

Smart Ass Set Up

Most times my ego allows me to consider myself a reasonably clever guy. My closest friends, those who know me best, simply consider me a well meaning smart ass Vancouver Realtor®. I as are they, are OK with this viewpoint.

Amongst those whom I hold most dear is a retired school teacher who too is well meaning. She is a dear person but until now I never considered her a smart ass. Cheeky yes, smartass no. This year with a mischievous look in her eye she did while turning her cheek, gave to me a gift of learning. A gift which I must presume was especially chosen to put my ‘smartassedness’ in its proper place. Good intentions I thought, but in reality, she set me up!

Her gift or what I now fondly refer to as the ‘Get The Smart Ass’ test, served only to reconfirm that I should stick to doing what I do best – be a humble peddler of fine Vancouver homes.

Pumpkin Pie Exams

We all think we know a lot of stuff. Yet when talking to our elders we often hear the refrain that we know so little. To this point consider the gift given by my still good and lasting school teacher friend – an 1895 Grade 8 Final exam.

Being the season of sharing I encourage you to go ahead! Take the exam! I dare yah! My guess is that you may find yourself joining me over here in the corner. In case you don’t recognize me, I’m the one with the pointy hat.

If you have come to keep me company then you like me, may want to reconsider if either of us is qualified to offer any commentary on the future of the Vancouver Real Estate market. You may also want to consider if you like me were set up.

Last, it should be noted that my friend makes a delicious pumpkin pie. I had hoped for a slice. There would be none for instead this Christmas, thanks to my good friend and this test, I was served humble pie. While the humble pie was humbling, I remain unfazed by her attempt to alter this self described humble peddler. To be clear, while her attempt to temper me was admirable I am still a smartass! She however, still wonders if the pumpkin pie would have helped score a better grade.

The Exam

“What it took to get an 8th grade education in 1895…

Remember when grandparents and great-grandparents stated that they only had an 8th grade education? Well, check this out. Could any of us have passed the 8th grade in 1895? “

“8th Grade Final Exam: Salina , KS – 1895”

Grammar (Time, one hour)

  1. Give nine rules for the use of capital letters.
  2. Name the parts of speech and define those that have no modifications.
  3. Define verse, stanza and paragraph
  4. What are the principal parts of a verb? Give principal parts of ‘lie,’ ‘play,’ and ‘run.’
  5. Define case; illustrate each case.
  6. What is punctuation? Give rules for principal marks of punctuation.
7 – 10. Write a composition of about 150 words and show therein that you understand the practical use of the rules of grammar.

Arithmetic (Time,1 hour 15 minutes)

  1. Name and define the Fundamental Rules of Arithmetic.
  2. A wagon box is 2 ft. Deep, 10 feet long, and 3 ft. Wide. How many bushels of wheat will it hold?
  3. If a load of wheat weighs 3,942 lbs., what is it worth at 50cts/bushel, deducting 1,050 lbs? For tare?
  4. District No 33 has a valuation of $35,000… What is the necessary levy to carry on a school seven months at $50 per month, and have $104 for incidentals?
  5. Find the cost of 6,720 lbs. Coal at $6.00 per ton.
  6. Find the interest of $512.60 for 8 months and 18 days at 7 percent.
  7. What is the cost of 40 boards 12 inches wide and 16 ft…? Long at $20 per metre?
  8. Find bank discount on $300 for 90 days (no grace) at 10 percent.
  9. What is the cost of a square farm at $15 per acre, the distance of which is 640 rods?
  10. Write a Bank Check, a Promissory Note, and a Receipt

U.S. History (Time, 45 minutes)

  1. Give the epochs into which U.S. History is divided
  2. Give an account of the discovery of America by Columbus
  3. Relate the causes and results of the Revolutionary War.
  4. Show the territorial growth of the United States
  5. Tell what you can of the history of Kansas
  6. Describe three of the most prominent battles of the Rebellion.
  7. Who were the following: Morse, Whitney, Fulton, Bell, Lincoln, Penn, and Howe?
  8. Name events connected with the following dates: 1607, 1620, 1800, 1849, and 1865.

Orthography (Time, one hour)

  1. What is meant by the following: alphabet, phonetic, orthography, etymology, syllabication
  2. What are elementary sounds? How classified?
  3. What are the following, and give examples of each: trigraph, subvocals, diphthong, cognate letters, linguals
  4. Give four substitutes for caret ‘u.’ (HUH?)
  5. Give two rules for spelling words with final ‘e.’ Name two exceptions under each rule.
  6. Give two uses of silent letters in spelling. Illustrate each.
  7. Define the following prefixes and use in connection with a word: bi, dis-mis, pre, semi, post, non, inter, mono, sup.
  8. Mark diacritically and divide into syllables the following, and name the sign that indicates the sound: card, ball, mercy, sir, odd, cell, rise, blood, fare, last.
  9. Use the following correctly in sentences: cite, site, sight, fane, fain, feign, vane, vain, vein, raze, raise, rays.
  10. Write 10 words frequently mispronounced and indicate pronunciation by use of diacritical marks and by syllabication.

Geography (Time, one hour)

  1. What is climate? Upon what does climate depend?
  2. How do you account for the extremes of climate in Kansas?
  3. Of what use are rivers? Of what use is the ocean?
  4. Describe the mountains of North America
  5. Name and describe the following: Monrovia, Odessa, Denver, Manitoba, Hecla, Yukon, St. Helena, Juan Fernandez, Aspinwall and Orinoco
  6. Name and locate the principal trade centers of the U.S. Name all the republics of Europe and give the capital of each…
  7. Why is the Atlantic Coast colder than the Pacific in the same latitude?
  8. Describe the process by which the water of the ocean returns to the sources of rivers.
  9. Describe the movements of the earth. Give the inclination of the earth.
*Copyright Salina Journal??

According to email received from my friend it is presumed that the quoted commentary can be attributed to the Salina Journal. The email also noted that the original document is on file at the Smoky Valley Genealogical Society and Library in Salina, and reprinted by the Salina Journal.

About Larry Yatkowsky

Larry is a recognized real estate expert. A veteran professional, his experienced counsel leads Vancouverites in his west side community to place their trust in a man passionate about his work. Uncompromising ethics bring a balanced approach to realizing your real estate dreams.

When Life Moves You - contact Larry:

*Disclaimer: Statistics Courtesy REBGV. While believed to be accurate they are not guaranteed.
**Numbers provided may vary as they are dynamically posted by the REBGV.

Reader Comments:

Village Whisperer Says:
December 27th, 2012 at 10:52 pm

Of course, smart asses answer test questions in their own ‘unique’ way (paste link into browser):–qByROAOMW8/UDKgJB3J_vI/AAAAAAAAAec/Ag4B83Z09nU/s1600/findx.gif

December 28th, 2012 at 8:32 am


Thanks for the chuckle. 🙂

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